a visual journal
it’s been a crazy ride since my last post.
on may 14 we made the decision to try to make the move from suburban family home to tiny city apartment. by june 5 our house had been fixed up and listed for sale. on june 14 we accepted an offer (for more than our asking price). closing is set for june 30.
stunned…grateful…excited….
more later.
(i photographed this cardinal nest in my mother-in-law’s rosebush a few weeks go.)
If you’ve ever seen something on my blog that you’d like to have, now’s your chance.
We’re looking to downsize to a tiny apartment in Fort Worth~ something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, and I don’t plan to take these things with me.
If you’re interested, I’m thinking maybe $10 for a journal page or other unmounted collage, and $25 for anything on wood or canvas…but if you like to haggle, feel free to make an offer.
For things I’ve already sold, traded, promised, given, or otherwise disposed of, I’m editing the posts to say “unavailable.” So, I invite you to cruise through my archives for a little shopping. You can contact me via email. debra_tennison@hotmail.com
about 8″ x 8″
my disintegration project (inspired by seth apter) began here. my first bundle flew away and i began again here on feb 12. it hasn’t been very long, but sun, wind and rain have done their part in this collaboration with nature. papers are wavy, colors are muted. a little paperclip rust, a little dirt . . . . they’re still a bit wet from our recent rain.
the next step will be making something(s) using these nature-kissed materials. we’ll show those later.
seth has links to all the (many!) artists working on this project. go see.
UNAVAILABLE about 9 1/2″ x 12″
1/4″ plywood, brown paper bag, gesso, watercolor, acrylic medium, black pencil.
another use for those silver and gold chocolate bar wrappers.
FIRST PIECE IS UNAVAILABLE
second piece is 9 1/2″ x 12″ on 1/4″ plywood.
found these grackle feathers in the yard yesterday. i just love the elegant simplicity of blackbirds.
7 3/4″ x 10″ misc. recycled papers, matboard, gesso, watercolor, acrylic medium, feathers, gold thread
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6×12″
ingredients: scrap 1/4″ plywood, junk mail envelope, newspaper (ft. worth star-telegram), brown paper bag (freebirds world burrito), haley’s tulle (used for texture and then pulled off), lauren’s greentea bag (tazo), black paper from old photo album, carpet tacks, gesso, watercolor, acrylic medium.
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the lunatic and the lover have been accounted for…now i just need a poet to find the beauty in this.
about 8 1/4″ almost square.
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cereal box, teabags, old journal page, studio waste, gesso, watercolor. tacked to cedar board.
re: the woven-look of the background: after using gesso and watercolor on the background, i glued on (with acrylic medium) some paper i had woven together. i put on a dark watercolor wash and then wiped it off. not liking the look, i ended up rubbing and peeling off the woven paper. the watercolor that had seeped through the weaving left the image you see. 9×9-ish.
time in “studio b” yesterday afternoon after a long absence due to spring and other distractions. started with a cereal box, tea bags, and a brown paper bag. a bit of gesso and watercolor. metal from the old compost bin i de-constructed recently. mounted on reclaimed cedar. about 11″ x 11″
i haven’t made a single thing since that tree last month, or kept up with my favorite blogs, but spring arrived here ~ how on earth could i stay inside?
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on cedar. about 9.5 x 9.5. this scan cropped a bit off both top and bottom.
cedar board. about 4.5″x 6.5″ UNAVAILABLE
on plywood. about 6″x 6″ NOT AVAILABLE
on cedar. about 6.75″ x 9.5″ NOT AVAILABLE
on cedar. about 10″ x 10″ this one didn’t fit in the scanner and the quality of my photo is poor. NOT AVAILABLE
constructive criticism welcome.
design motifs from Pompeii, cut from collaged recyclables and painted papers, mounted on scrap plywood. each about 6″x7″
THESE ARE UNAVAILABLE
second try. papers secured to board with wire and jute; lashed to a heavy flagstone underneath. on pedestal so dog won’t chew it. sentinel on duty.
yes, well, about that collaborating with nature project . . . .
last night brother wind came by and snatched away my project. it’s probably in the top of a tree somewhere. he also sucked the skylight out of our roof, and sister water happily poured into james’s studio. what fun.
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the last of this series. this one’s for my daughter. i started with 6 (free!) 8×10 canvases, but decided one day to entirely redo the first two, so my series of 6 is numbered 3 through 8.
it’s the end of the “déjà vu” series, but not the end of my making things from recyclables.
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i bought some black gesso to try on this one. first i collaged the entire canvas with recycled papers; then cut out 9 leaves from leftover shelf paper, stuck them on, brushed on the black gesso, scribbled a bit with the end of a paintbrush, then pulled off the leaves. after it dried i coated it in gloss gel medium (also a first for me), which gives it a lacquered look.
thought i’d join seth and friends in this collaboration with nature project. you can read about it here. a cold rain was beginning to fall as i read the post, so i quickly gathered some of my paper scraps and a piece of cheesecloth, fastened them together with a stick and one stitch of waxed linen, and hurried out to tie it to a chair. (this chair has definitely felt the effects of time and the elements, so i thought it would be a good place.) we’ll see the results next spring.
edit 2-11-09: see update
edit 2-12-09: nevah give up
here’s #6 (made from the rejected #1 that i ripped up). i stained the stretcher strips and tacked the canvas on.
any constructive criticism?
today i joined the local fiber guild ~ thanks carolyn! they meet monthly and do a project together. today we made baskets from gourds.
looking over the schedule for the next few months i saw that the march meeting will be PAPERMAKING! fancy that.
when i photographed post oak moon two days ago, it was 80 degrees. today, it’s winter again. texas is not only big . . .it’s weird.
one of the things i want to try this year is papermaking. i’m thinking of buying a kit. any thoughts, suggestions?
last night we saw a nice little film ~ “how about you.” one character plays a nocturne. i think he said it was by saint-saëns. i’d upload it for you if i could.
p.s. thank you all so much for the crit! i do so much appreciate it.
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as mentioned in my last post, i present déjà vu 5 for critique – anonymously if you so choose. do you think it “works?” why or why not?
i set out to do something in greys and browns with stuff from the recycling bin. pretty early on i put on a glaze of matte medium with a bit of black acrylic in it and then wiped it off. you know how each decision you make narrows your options? at that point i realized i was going to make something that looked like it’d been run over in the street – and i was okay with that. the further i took it the more it felt like winter in the city to me. “mona lisa’s and mad hatters” started up in my head. the last thing i did was add the twig. you know how a plant will sprout in a crack in the asphalt or concrete? it always gives me pleasure . . . and hope.
here’s my fourth try for the series. recyclables and backyard leaves. UNAVAILABLE
i’m working on #5 now. i started the fifth one with only one idea ~ it would be browns and greys. i guess i did assume it would be clean, clear browns and greys, but in fact it’s getting pretty dirty and ragged. i may hate it in the end, but i’ll post it anyway in a day or two and maybe some of you will give me a “crit.”
actually, that’s something i would very much appreciate. i’m alone in my “classroom” with no prof to pick my things apart. james is too tender-hearted to be brutally honest. so, anyone up for a crit? you may comment under anonymous if it makes you feel better.
p.s. happy happy happy new year! it’s my favorite holiday.
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six 8 x 10 canvases were shipped to us by mistake. when james called to make arrangements to ship them back, he was told to just keep them. he then gave them to me. well, thought i, maybe i’ll make a series. maybe i’ll use recycled “trash” and old journal pages and such. maybe i’ll call the series déjà vu because it’s all stuff we’ve seen before. this is actually the third one i’ve made. the first two didn’t please me so i think i’ll cut them up and reuse the parts i like on another one. (déjà-déjà vu.)
andrew of urbanpaperarts sent me three of his stars for my star tree! they look wonderful with my green and gold stars ~ THANK YOU ANDREW!
and to all those who celebrate, i wish you a happy festival of lights!
a fragrant wreath (a gift from friends)
one small tree (my stars this year)
candlelight (these metal camels a gift from a friend); and a ceramic nativity (created by our talented niece).
“manny” hangs out year-round in our living room, changing positions when no one is looking. at christmas he becomes angelic.
o. henry’s “the gift of the magi” is one of my favorite stories. we bought this lisbeth zwerger-illustrated edition in 1982 and every year i cry over it again.
that’s all i’m pulling out of the christmas box this year. we just add music, food, and people we love for our simple christmas.
now i have a question for you: i’d like you to tell me your favorite christmas movies.
mama
my mother was a seamstress. she loved flowers. she liked robert frost, thus the lines from “the tuft of flowers.”
you’ll have to use your imagination for this one. no photo available.
a couple of miles from my suburban home is a small park i often walk to with my friend lynn. a walkway leads around the little playground, ending down by a small pond. a murky little pond almost surrounded by native trees, virginia creeper, underbrush and litter. we usually see turtles there, sometimes a few mallards, often cardinals and other birds.
when we arrived there this morning at 8:30, an area across the pond was lit up by sunlight, with a perfect reflection cast on the still pond. bare trees, some autumn leaves, dry grasses, in a beautiful, symmetrical work of art. and in the center of this bright vision, standing just at the water’s edge, a huge, beautiful heron.
after a few minutes, we turned and walked back to our homes and families.
simple gifts are the best after all.
wishing you simple gifts shared with people you love.
a couple of years ago i bought a small metal tree from smith&hawkin. last year i folded paper cranes to hang from it. this year i’m making stars from recycled odds and ends. on a piece of matboard, i glued various scraps that otherwise would have gone in the recycling bin or compost: some junk mail, ticket stubs, used teabags (i did put the tea in the compost pile), a doiley from a bridal shower, etc. then i covered it with layers of acrylic paint and gesso. after it dried, i cut out stars. as i have time, i add a bent-wire hook, and some little embellishment to each one (gold thread, a few tiny beads, etc.) i also cut out some smaller stars and covered them with the gold inner wrapper from a chocolate bar (dark, dark, dark, choc!). when i told james what i’d done, he decided we needed lots more of these gold stars . . .in fact, he feels one can never have too many small gold stars. i’m okay with that.
as promised, the trading card post! (our scanner, unfortunately, doesn’t do them justice. )
the very first card i received was, appropriately, from bobbi, my very first inspiration and encourager in artblog world:
two lovely cards from the wonderful sukipoet:
two fun cards from cathy parmelee, a fellow “maniac” journaler:
a beautiful little bluebird from karen mowrey:
the house i want to live in, by the lovely and talented lauren mowrey, also known as pajama girl:
a beautiful dragonfly print from pamela carriker, another “maniac” friend:
a dreamy little card from the uk by crissi harvey, yet another “maniac” journaler:
a beautifully simple image and thought from m. heart made with her own handmade and embossed paper:
two awesome and inspiring cards from the awesome and inspiring seth apter:
and just a few days ago, this precious little dutch angel arrived from the netherlands, the work of another journaling friend, audrey meijs:
thanks again so much to all of you for sharing your art with me!
my only recent photos were taken when stopped at traffic lights. these strings of [living] ebony beads always delight me.
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yes, i’m addicted to blue. and blackbirds.
i photographed this grackle the other day at the botanic garden, and decided to do a series of cards with him. also some pages from a tattered old copy of a midsummer’s night dream.
the next two are “rebel trading cards” and are about 3 1/4 x 3 5/8
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“. . .our conscious minds are indeed only the tiny tip of the iceberg which is above the water, and the largest part of ourselves is unseen below the water, below the conscious level, and it is not easy to admit this, to admit it and not fear that large part of ourselves over which we have very little control, but in which lies enormous freedom, and the world of poetry, music, and the region of that deepest and truest prayer which is beyond all our feeble and filtering words. We need prayers of words, yes; the words are the path to contemplation; but the deepest communion with God is beyond words, on the other side of silence.” ~Madeleine L’Engle
maybe you’ve noticed the “many maniacs” link there on the left under categories. (it ended up there by accident, but i left it because it’s so handy and easy to find.) karen invited me to join this group of visual journalers, and i’m so glad i did. it’s a nice place to meet other journalers, see their pages, ask questions, find encouragement and inspiration. one result is that i’m starting a new journal. my old ones are all in spiral sketchbooks, so the pages i’ve shared here have all been scanned and cropped. for “many maniacs creating art,” i wanted to be able to do two-page things and scan them, but my old sketchbooks are too big for that. i looked around the house for something that would fit on the scanner opened up and found an old lined moleskine journal that is the perfect size. (the watercolor-style moleskine would probably be better . . .maybe in future.) anyway, i discovered that i very much enjoy the no-spiral journal! so that’s what i’m using for now.
if you are interested in starting a visual journal, and would like to be part of a group, let me know.
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i made these from painted papers and crayon rubbings on tracing paper. they’re mounted on gessoed old-book pages (the taming of the shrew). i also still have #2, 3, and 5 (left to right, top to bottom) from the last post.
karen has first choice. i hope you like them.
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so, when i told bobbi i wanted to trade atc’s with her, she said she only does rebel cards (no rules). these are for you, bobbi, if you like any of them. they are not 2.5 x 3.5 inches. if anyone else wants rebel cards — these are actually about 3 1/4 x 3 5/8″ – you are also welcome to choose one. they are my very first trading cards, and i had so much fun making them that i want to start some more tomorrow. i’ll even maybe do some 2.5 x 3.5 . . . if i feel like it. : )
yes, well i’m feeling better today. i’ve had a couple of weeks to freely make messes in my journal and to mull over the whole idea of whether or not to share it. no, i’m not a proper writer or artist or photographer, but i do have this urge to create. the way i see it, if God made me this way, i should just go with it and not worry about some possible judgemental viewer who might think my things are amateurish and weird. so i’ve decided to just let the amateurish weirdness flow. . . at least for now . . . . this realization that it’s okay to make and share these things actually came out of my recent grappling with another issue i’ve been dealing with for years.
it’s the old cry of “why did you make me this way?” (which believers are not supposed to say to God, but of course we do). i’m shy, quiet, too sensitive, and somewhat agoraphobic, but i’ve spent my whole life trying to act like i’m not, and feeling guilty when i fail. why? because it’s socially unacceptable to be shy and a homebody. because i had this idea that “handicaps” are given to us so that we become stronger by overcoming them. it suddenly came into my head yesterday that this whole idea might be nonsense. my son has tourette’s. can anyone imagine God saying to him, “i made you this way, but i will not be pleased with you if you tic.” or can you imagine him saying to a crippled person, “i made you this way, but you must not limp.” this thought made me feel a little better about my “handicap,” but then an even wilder thought came to me. maybe God doesn’t even consider shyness and sensitivity a handicap! maybe he likes quietness and sensitivity as much as boldness. maybe he likes us to be who we are!
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You see, the problem is I’m not a blogger. Or an artist. I’m just a person who keeps a visual journal for catharsis, and for the joy of playing with shapes and colors. In an insane moment I started sharing online what had been private.
” . . .lives hidden behind faces, divided by fathoms of empty space, wrapped round in silence which one of them breaks then with maybe some word that in one way or another means Know me, Know me . . . .” (Frederick Buechner)
It’s been two months today. There have been 803 visits. Except for a few individuals, I don’t know who looks at this or what you think. I’m finding it harder to find the joy and freedom I felt before. A journal page suddenly needs to be a work of art. Something worthy of showing in public. The thought paralyzes me.
. . . I don’t know if I’ll completely abandon n2theblue or not.
(don’t worry, the portuguese note is to my husband)
”We also rightly speak of intuition or inspiration as a gift. As the artist works, some portion of his creation is bestowed upon him. An idea pops into his head, a tune begins to play, a phrase comes to mind, a color falls in place on the canvas. Usually, in fact, the artist does not find himself engaged or exhilarated by the work, nor does it seem authentic, until this gratuitous element has appeared, so that along with any true creation comes the uncanny sense that ‘I,’ the artist, did not make the work.” — from intro to The Gift, How the Creative Spirit Transforms the World, by Lewis Hyde
I never actually made it through this entire book, but read the intro far from home one cloudy day while sitting on an uncomfortable bench by the Thames. My mother-in-law watched the river and the passersby; my husband did a little watercolor sketch of the Houses of Parliament; Big Ben chimed; the Queen Elizabeth cruised by with a wedding in progress, white-veiled bride and black-tuxedoed groom in the bow. And I read this quote and thought, “Yes, that’s it exactly.”
Is it that way for you? Comments welcome.
“I was born on the prairie, where the wind blew free and there was nothing to break the light of the Sun . . . and where everything drew a free breath.”
–Parra Wa-Samen (Ten Bears) of the Yamaparika Comanches, Treaty Speech of 1872
as with many of these pages, there are layers of meaning here, but these questions primarily concern my interaction with art supplies in creating journal pages. when they don’t do what i want or expect, i sometimes change direction and follow their lead, and i sometimes arm myself (so to speak) and try to force my will on them. there’s a lot of “back and forth-ing” in the process. the answer, “it’s a conversation,” was offered by my husband who has for many years been “conversing” with his paints.
James gave me a little digital camera for Christmas! In July!
Here are three of my first photos.
“I had always believed that the world involved magic: now I thought that perhaps it involved a magician. And this pointed a profound emotion always present and sub-conscious; that this world of ours has some purpose; and if there is a purpose, there is a person. I had always felt life first as a story: and if there is a story there is a story-teller.” — from Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton
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sometimes i cut up journal pages for postcards, as here. sometimes i work directly on 4.25″ x 6″ watercolor paper or cardstock. i like postcards: small images requiring small messages and small postage.
i discovered a torn-up page of experimental watercolor washes in james’ studio trash. i taped them up, added more paint and my homemade rubber stamps, and wired together a little book. i think the patches make it sort of wabi-sabi.
